Thursday, November 6, 2008
Episode 37: Adventures in Breakfast and Persimmons
When last we left our intrepid hero he was bounding around on the tops of buildings trying to find the mystical lollipop that Dr. Devastator had hidden in a vain attempt to take over the world. Oh, that Dr. Devastator, when will he learn?
Today, our hero arrived at work battling Haven’t-Eaten-Breakfast Man. Realizing the futility of attempting to be in any way productive on an empty stomach, he ventured back down to street level through his building’s Jefferies Tubes and went in search of a solid meal to start his day that had, in fact, long ago already started.
Curses! The corporate villainy of the new Large-Fancy-Hotel-Residency down the block had taken over the lease of our hero’s favorite corner deli forcing it to shutter its doors. Why? Why must you control the entire block? So you can open a branch of another failed financial institution like you’re doing in the other retail space you control?
But our hero was not defeated in his quest. No! His favorite corner deli had another location a few blocks away. Braving the low hanging sun in his eyes, our hero ventured forth in search of it. Upon finding it, he discovered that this location also featured a breakfast buffet! Grabbing a healthy assortment of eggs, bacon, and tater tots, our hero returned to his building and ascended the Jefferies Tubes to his cube shaped daytime super-lair.
Unbeknownst to our hero, the breakfast buffet at the deli had fallen into the hands of that dastardly villain Over-Cooked-And-Filled-With-Grease Ogre. In retrospect, our hero probably should have seen that one coming.
With his half finished breakfast slowly turning to stone on his desk, our hero bemoaned his lack of fruit, only to have the Magic Email Fairy deliver to his inbox a message from his co-worker saying that fresh from her boyfriend’s parent’s garden tangerines and persimmons were available in the production room.
Using his catlike speed, our hero snatched up a tangerine and devoured it. Still hungry, he went back for this “per-si-mmon”. Now, our hero had certainly encountered the concept of persimmons before. I mean, after all, who could forget how he used a persimmon to save the world in his great How Our Hero Used a Persimmon to Save the World Adventure? And yet, somehow, our hero had never actually eaten one in its original fresh-from-the-tree form. Somewhere along the way, our hero had developed a predisposition to think that persimmon’s tasted bad. Perhaps it was a residual effect of that crazy time when Dr. Devastator was controlling his brain through chocolate pudding, or maybe he had simply been misinformed, but our hero had never been eager to eat one.
His co-worker, Great-Fruit-Provider Woman, told him to use the peeler to remove the skin and then eat it. Our hero peeled his persimmon and looked skeptically at the pale orange fruit within. Then he bit into it.
Immediately our hero was visited by the Taste-Sensation Fairy, who filled his taste buds with an oddly familiar yet difficult to describe taste sensation that reminded our hero of cinnamon and apple and some other fall flavor, like eating a crisp autumn day where the leaves have all turned yellow and burnt orange, or like eating an apple pie in fruit form. Our hero gobble it up and looks forward to eating many more in the future.
Will our hero’s next persimmon taste as good?
Why did he wait so long to try one in the first place?
What poor unsuspecting store will Large-Fancy-Hotel-Residency take over next?
And most importantly…
Do you like persimmons?
Find out the answers to these important questions and more in the next episode of
Our Intrepid Hero