Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Episode 19: When Allergies Attack


When last we left our intrepid hero, he had retooled his website www.experimentfarm.com and started blogging there daily. Wasn’t that exciting?

Our hero’s ongoing battle with the Seasonal-Allergy Monster escalated last week when the dastardly villain hit our hero squarely in the nose with his Transfigurometer transforming it into a Gushing Snot Faucet.

Quickly, our hero went to the local superhero supply store to procure an antidote, but the 24-hour Cetirizine Hydrochloride tablet only served to transform his nose into a Running Snot Faucet while at the same time afflicting him with an attack of the Drowsiness Fiend.

Battered, but not defeated, our hero visited another superhero supply store and procured some Diphenhydramine Hydrochloride tablets. Knowing, however, that these tablets pack the punch of the You-Must-Sleep-Now! Villain, our hero decided to accompany them with the counter-acting power of Pseudoephedrine tablets, which, as we all know, you can use to make meth.

Boom! That did it. For brief 4 hour stints our hero’s nose returned to normal, and with the uppers and the downers duking it out to a stalemate, our hero’s brain functions were relatively normal.

“Relatively” being the key word, for unbeknownst to our hero, Diphenhydramine Hydrochloride also comes with the hidden villain Side-Effect-Of-Depression Man, which hit our hero in full force Sunday night as he attempted to tackle Filling-His-Taxes Boy. The near tragic combination left our hero with incomplete tax forms and an antihistamine hang over Monday morning.

The worst seems to have past however. Not only has the Seasonal-Allergy Monster taken a hit form Lower-Pollen-Count Man, but our hero has discovered the wonder from the far east that is the Neti Pot! (don’t knock it ‘till you’ve tried it)

What exactly is a Neti Pot?
Who knows the common terms for the above drugs?
And most importantly…
Who’s your pick in March Madness?

Find out the answers to these important questions and more in the next episode of
Our Intrepid Hero!

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